This just in from the Ministry of Truth! – 12/27/2012 Edition

2012 December 27
by justrand

The Labor Department said Thursday that weekly applications dropped 11,000 12,000 from 361,000 362,000 to a seasonally (allspice) adjusted 350,000 in the week ended Dec. 22.

The Labor Department is really really certain of that number, because they had solid reporting from all 57 50 48 31 States!!  Ok, ok…so information from 19 States had to be fabricated estimated.  Remember the BLS motto: “Accuracy…meh!”

Still, even if we/they had to “estimate” the AWESOME NEWS…it is still (aproximately) AWESOME NEWS (until it is, um, “revised”).  Thus, since only AWESOME NEWS is permitted in the Age of Obama, everything is just peachy…and this is a major success of our “War Against Negative Things” (WANT) campaign.

Despite this awesome fabrication news, our Comrades in the A/P provide this cautionary note:

Consumers are starting to worry about higher taxes. A measure of consumer confidence fell to a five-month low this month, a survey released Friday found. And reports show the holiday shopping season was the weakest since 2008, when the country was in a deep recession.

We all remember how AWFUL things were in 2008 under the manical George W. Bush!  Back then (as the A/P notes) we were in a “deep recession“…and the Unemployment Rate was 7.2%   STAGGERINGLY awful!  Now, of course, we are NOT in a “deep recession“, and are enjoying an Unemployment Rate of 7.7%.    If that seems like a contradiction to you, it is ONLY because you don’t understand the complex economic factors (including air-speed, water-temperature and pollen count, etc) that are involved.  Trust us (and the A/P, of course) that it was a “deep recession” then…and everything is JUST FINE now! (i.e., don’t make us have to “explain” it to you in person!)

We do, of course, remain at war with Eurasia Eastasia Eurasia EastAsia Eurasia EastAsia Eurasia EastAsia, whom we have always been at war with.  In fact, Lord Obama is so concerned with the war against EastAsia that he flew to Hawaii to more closely monitor things!

This week’s Public Service Announcement

Rumors that SecState Hillary Clinton is “hiding out” to avoid testifying before Congress regarding our “Victory at Benghazi” are just that: rumors!  Hillary is EAGER to testify, but has had a series of ailments that have prevented her doing so.  These include:

  • Flatulence
  • Dandruff
  • Bad-hair
  • Toe-jam
  • TWO in-grown toenails (discovered during the toe-jam removal process)

Clearly Hillary needs our prayers!

32 Responses leave one →
  1. 2012 December 27 7:19 am
    justrand permalink

    Hillary would LOVE to explain this as well:

    The four officials supposedly out of jobs because of their blunders in the run-up to the deadly Benghazi terror attack remain on the State Department payroll — and will all be back to work soon, The NY Post has learned.

  2. 2012 December 27 7:23 am
    MI Conservative permalink

    I saw where a number of newspapers dropped AP from their reporting. I think there was 6 of them including the Chicago Tribune.

    O/T copied from previous post.

    What a wonderful post bc (about CMU bowl game). Thanks a bajillion. It means a lot to me along with all the prayers and good wishes from everyone here.

  3. 2012 December 27 7:34 am
    justrand permalink

    Dear MIC,

    The newspapers that have dropped our A/P Comrades will be re-educated on the awesomeness of that organization…stay tuned. The fact is that there is so much TRUTH! ™ that we here at the Ministry rely on our Comrades at the A/P and Reuters to help us disseminate it all!

    We are sure that the 6 newspapers will re-think their decision after we “explain” it to them!

    Minion 43421/gf
    Media Relations Division, Bowel-Level 22, Ministry of Truth

  4. 2012 December 27 8:14 am
    justrand permalink

    Senator Diane Feinstein (and she’s the more-or-less SANE Senator from Calif) is going to introduce this Bill:

    this includes the following:
    Bans the sale, transfer, importation, or manufacturing of:
    – 120 specifically-named firearms
    – Certain other semiautomatic rifles, handguns, shotguns that can accept a detachable magazine and have one military characteristic
    – Semiautomatic rifles and handguns with a fixed magazine that can accept more than 10 rounds

    The 2nd listed item (the “one military characteristic” line item) is the one umbrella that can be used to grab pretty much everything up to (but not including) your butter-knives.

    “one military characteristic”??? Um, military firearms shoot BULLETS…so if your firearm shoots BULLETS then it already has “one military characteristic”. Ta Da!

  5. 2012 December 27 8:36 am
    mulletover permalink

    Frank Luntz, the crying pissypants pollster for the GOP, finds the NRA and the GOP are not listening to the American people regarding gun control.

    Sure, Frank. We all want more background checks and limits on our freedom, and we surely want to defend our homes with “a single shot rifle and a one-eyed dog.”

  6. 2012 December 27 9:37 am
    judyt2012 permalink

    My Glock comes with 2 17 round clips… I think this works given that my 12 guage will only hold two rounds. I’m joining a firing range and spend some time getting very comfortable with both. The guy sold me on it because he said they never jam. The problems with my old 9mm was that it jammed all the time.

    The gun shop where I picked up my glock had almost no inventory… seems that last three weeks have been overwhelming and Sunday there was a traffic jam driving by Clark Brothers which is a Warrenton VA gun store and firing range.

    Oh… the insult is that I used some of my bonus (yes federal workers are getting bonuses this year) to buy the gun.

  7. 2012 December 27 9:47 am
    judyt2012 permalink

    As to military characteristics… before deploying to Afghanistan and Iraq my (desk jockey/logistics Colonel) ex was given a sidearm that is very much like the gun I just bought… does this mean that I own a gun with military characteristics?

    Problem is that the definitions are a mess… what exactly do they mean by magazine? I have the impression that they are using the terms clip and magazine interchangeably when they are not.

  8. 2012 December 27 10:11 am
    Mr Evilwrench permalink

    There’s a lot of confusion among the uninitiated between magazines and clips. So many TV shows and movies use the word “clip”. Your Glock indeed uses magazines, as does, say an AR. I keep my 5.56 for the AR on clips, specifically stripper clips, so that I can reload the magazines quickly.

  9. 2012 December 27 11:30 am
    bc3b permalink

    “The newspapers that have dropped our A/P Comrades will be re-educated on the awesomeness of that organization…stay tuned.”

    We talking Hut 1368 Minion?

  10. 2012 December 27 11:37 am
    bc3b permalink

    “Oh… the insult is that I used some of my bonus (yes federal workers are getting bonuses this year) to buy the gun.”

    Gee, at all my jobs in private industry I never received a bonus unless the company had a profit. In fact, sometimes the company was actually profitable, but took write-offs which affected my bonus (if I received one at all). If profitability wasn’t what it was supposed to be, you received a list of employees you had to whack – and I never worked for a company that had anything close to a trillion dollar loss.

  11. 2012 December 27 11:48 am
    drdog09 permalink

    Hillary’s biggest problem is that she needs about 6 months of Course that still won’t fix stupid.

  12. 2012 December 27 11:52 am
    drdog09 permalink

    … and I never worked for a company that had anything close to a trillion dollar loss.

    Heck, name a company that has a trillion dollar profit? There aren’t any.

  13. 2012 December 27 1:35 pm
    judyt2012 permalink

    Contact any and all representatives and demand that they add an amendment to all gun control legislation that makes the White House, Capitol and all federal buildings gun free zones, including guns carried by security personnel. This would include the keystone kops security kompany guarding my building, to the secret service agents surrounding every Obama, Biden, Jarrett, et al. If these people want to limit the individuals ability for self-protection then they must be willing to walk the walk. I also suggest that the disarming of their security personnel preceed by 12 to 24 months the effective date of any gun restrictions.

  14. 2012 December 27 3:15 pm
    drdog09 permalink

    EPA admin steps down — — just as one NGO is suing for her alias emails. Coincidence?

  15. 2012 December 27 5:16 pm
    gnqanq permalink

    Saying I am pissed is an understatement. All I can say to the left is – keep poking – you may not like what you get.

  16. 2012 December 27 5:27 pm
    Wylie E. Coyote permalink

    “A society that chooses between capitalism and socialism does not choose between two social systems; it chooses between social cooperation and the disintegration of society. Socialism: is not an alternative to capitalism; it is an alternative to any system under which men can live as human beings.”
    – Ludwig von Mises

  17. 2012 December 27 6:03 pm
    drdog09 permalink

    Numbers I am seeing the country is already cooked. All some central bank has to do is trigger an interest rate rise to say 3-4% and the Treasury goes belly up. @ 3%, if you 100% confiscated all earnings from all taxpayers actually paying into the system the money is not enough to pay the ongoing debt payments. Read that again — If you 100% confiscated all earnings from all taxpayers actually paying into the system the money is not enough to pay the ongoing debt payments.

    Busted! That fact by comparison makes the fiscal cliff a side show.

  18. 2012 December 27 6:35 pm
    gnqanq permalink

    drdog – was listening to Rush today. A caller called in (idiot liberal) who agreed with a statement once made by Dick Chaney that debt was irrelevant. The host could not reason with this idiot on how this was undermining the value of the dollar.

    Can not wait to see this useless eater (and other like him) wiping their arse with 10’s and 20’s when toilet paper is worth more than the U.S. dollar.

  19. 2012 December 27 7:03 pm
    drdog09 permalink


    Here’s a game I like to play with liberals.

    [me] Right now the govt borrows 40% of every dollar it spends from someone else. That is a fact. Are you comfortable with that idea?
    [lib] Sure. Its worked ok so far.
    [me] Fine. Well if 40% if ok. Why not jack that number up to 100% and not have the government collect any taxes? The economy would boom with the extra investment income!
    [lib] Wait! The country would go bankrupt!
    [me] Tell me how? You just agreed that going busted slowly (40%) is fine so you ought to be comfortable with going busted quickly (100%). The principle did not change just the number. Or is there something else that drives your philosophy about funding the government?

    Invariably they don’t have a defensible answer. They can’t admit that their real motivation is envy which the above exchange clearly exposes.

  20. 2012 December 27 7:11 pm
    bc3b permalink

    I don’t know who the substitute host was on Rush today, but he was pretty bad – almost like listening to Hannity. I sometimes think Rush and Mark Levin purposely pick bad substitute hosts. I really like Brian Sussman when he subs for Levin, but there’s an Inga that drives me up the wall.

  21. 2012 December 27 7:27 pm
    mulletover permalink

    Today’s guest host was Mark Belling. He is an afternoon drive time talker on News Talk 1130, WISN, Milwaukee.

  22. 2012 December 27 8:04 pm
    Wylie E. Coyote permalink

    “Obama is the biggest spender of any politician in world history.

    What does this have to do with guns? It’s the same story. Every time there’s a crisis politicians learn the wrong lesson… come up with the wrong solution… and always use the crisis as a reason to take away our freedoms and grow government bigger.

    Take the debt crisis: Obama wants to raise taxes, so we lose our economic freedom, and government grows bigger… while we add more debt to solve a debt crisis. That should work out well!

    Take 9/11 — Bush spent billions on the formation of Homeland Security, hundreds of thousands of expensive new government employees, started two wars, and took many of our civil rights away.

    Take global warming — Obama wants to tax us to death, double our electric bills, take away our freedoms, and put government in charge of business.

    Take the health care crisis — Obama passed Obamacare to raise our taxes, grow government, unionize healthcare workers, and put government in charge of our health.”

  23. 2012 December 27 8:07 pm
    Wylie E. Coyote permalink

    “But for me, it’s always been a personal and emotional argument, even more than a factual one. I’m a proud Jewish American. Over six million of my fellow Jews were enslaved, starved, tortured, and then slaughtered by Adolph Hitler. Before it could happen, in 1938, Hitler banned gun ownership for Jews.

    That act on Nov. 11, 1938 was the beginning of the end for German Jews. Millions of Jews were left defenseless from that day forward. Just like the criminals in the studies above, who were far less likely to break into a home or attack a victim, if they feared the victim was armed; Hitler only started his murderous genocide after first ensuring his victims were disarmed, defenseless and helpless.

    But why should that surprise anyone. Virtually every dictator in history has started his murderous reign by disarming the population.

    The communist leaders of China recently issued a statement in response to our Newtown, Conn., tragedy. They said that Obama must disarm the American people. I wonder why they’re so interested in our people being disarmed? What do you think they have in mind?”

  24. 2012 December 27 8:25 pm
    gnqanq permalink

    bc3b – it was Mark Belling. He is out of Milwaukee and is pretty good when it comes to economics. He usually makes some very good points on economic issues but seem to have a bad day today.

  25. 2012 December 28 6:20 am
    drdog09 permalink

    First they came for the Telcos and I did nothing. Then they came for the ISPs and yet I still did nothing. Now they are coming for the Facebook accounts and I do nothing still —

    Do you really want to be supporting an element of the regime that is trampling on your freedoms and are doing so right in front of you??

  26. 2012 December 28 6:28 am
    justrand permalink

    EXCELLENT article and lists…this is a clip & save (though our folks here have already come up with most of these, it is nice to see a consolidated list)

    AND…the list at the end on Civil Disobedience is something we didn’t dwell much on…here it is (with my highlighting of my favorites):

    Comply with government orders as slowly as possible.
    Fill out government forms incompletely and illegibly.
    •Pay all taxes and fines at the last possible legal moment.
    Make it difficult for the government to enforce all unconstitutional or immoral laws.
    •As a juror, exercise your right to nullify unconstitutional or immoral laws.
    •Take multiple copies of all printed government forms to increase their costs.
    •Take a job with the government, and then don’t do it.
    •Boycott government propaganda outlets such as PBS and NPR.
    •Get your money invested offshore while it is still safe and legal to do so.

  27. 2012 December 28 6:41 am
    drdog09 permalink

    “Take a job with the government, and then don’t do it.”

    I bet Judy is doing her part. 😉

  28. 2012 December 28 6:50 am
    justrand permalink

    drdog, I actually tend to think our Judy can’t stop herself from doing the best job possible…it’s in her blood. It’s only the Left that believes you’re entitled to be paid to merely occupy a chair.

    these two from the list are something EVERYBODY can do every time:
    – Comply with government orders as slowly as possible.
    – Fill out government forms incompletely and illegibly.

    Fatigue the government…use their size against them. Imagine if when returning a form you were required to fill out, you sent it to a DIFFERENT agency “by mistake”?? I, of course, would NEVER EVER do such a thing…but imagine if someone did…”by mistake”?? So be very careful when filling out and mailing those forms, folks!!

  29. 2012 December 28 7:14 am
    drdog09 permalink


    Following your line of reasoning, come this tax season everyone should file a 1040X. That’s an extension of filing. It is generally automatic. You then hold off sending in your final form 3 months later. At worse they might bill you for 3 months interest.

    (This is NOT legal or tax advise. Your actions are your own in this matter and Dog here disavows all knowledge thereto. )

  30. 2012 December 28 7:25 am
    justrand permalink

    what everyone should do, regardless, is up their exemptions to the max and not give the government one penny more during the year. Refund checks are an abomination (took me years to realize that).

    Withholding is THE chain that around American’s necks. If Withholding was repealed the entire tax system would collapse in exactly one year. Which is why no one from either Party ever mentions it.

  31. 2012 December 28 11:30 am

    Take multiple copies of all printed government forms to increase their costs

    Unfortunately it is OUR costs

  32. 2012 December 28 11:30 am

    Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the Government take care of him better take a closer look at the American Indian”

    Henry Ford

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