This Just in from The Ministry of Truth! – Impeachment Edition

2020 January 30
by justrand

No one…and we mean NO ONE…knows who the “Whistleblower” is. Not even the Whistleblower!! Every day he/she/it looks in the mirror, and asks: “Who the HELL are you??” It must be VERY exasperating!

Thus we here in the Ministry of Truth (aka: “the media”) are proud to announce our support for Adam Schiff (for brains), and the Democrat Party, as they protect America (and the Whistleblower his/her/itself) from discovering who he/she/it is!

Even Justice Roberts has now gotten into the act, when he silenced Senator Rand Paul as he TRIED to utter the name “Eric Ciaramella”…a name that couldn’t POSSIBLY be the “Whistleblower” (since NO ONE knows who he/she/it is…remember?)

If this was America, then clearly it would be important for President Trump’s legal team to question he/she/it regarding whatever they allegedly heard (whether 2nd, 3rd or 4th hand), and be able to determine not only the veracity of their claims, but also any biases they might have…and the provenance of any documentation, including how the “complaint” was originally crafted.

As a dear friend of the Ministry of Truth, Lavrentiy Beria, once said: “Show me the man and I’ll find you the crime”. Well heck, we KNOW the man (President Trump), and thus after four years of looking we should be able to just declare him guilty of “something”, and move on…without putting America’s NATIONAL SECURITY at risk by uttering a name like, for instance, “Eric Ciaramella” .

Anyone who read the Harry Potter books knows you do NOT utter the name “Voldemort”…it is the same principle.

And then there is the matter of “Obstruction of Congress”…now THERE is crime! Congress must NEVER be “obstructed”, or slowed down in any way! There are new taxes to create, money to waste, and bribes to take…they must NOT be obstructed!

And if a Ukrainian crime syndicate (Burisma) wants to hire Hunter Biden to do nothing for $2 million for a couple years, it is NONE of our business!! We here at the Ministry of Truth only offered him $1 million to do nothing, and thus it is not surprising that Hunter took the more lucrative offer. We can only imagine that if Joe Biden becomes President, then Hunter Biden will get more offers to do nothing for even more millions of dollars…he is apparently REALLY good at it!

As surely as we have ALWAYS been at war with Eurasia EastAsia Eurasia EastAsia, Donald Trump must have done SOMETHING wrong, so let’s just go with that!

==>  This week’s Public Service Announcement

Citizens of Virginia are reminded that they are a clear danger to, well, everyone! Thus it is for the good of everyone (even themselves) that their (antiquated) “Rights” to bear arms, speak their minds, peaceably assemble and harbor “religious” beliefs are being trampled restricted.

Governor “Blackface” Northam has indicated that if they would but KNEEL to him, then he might ease a restriction or two…after they complete their Re-Education. That sounds extremely fair, and thus they should just STFU and kneel already!!

65 Responses leave one →
  1. 2020 January 30 5:43 pm
    bc3b permalink

    Thank you, Minion. Now I know what to think. I really needed your help.

  2. 2020 January 30 6:05 pm
    justrand permalink

    Dear bc3b,

    We here at the Ministry of Truth are always happy to tell you what, when, and how to think! Although it’s a job, we REALLY love our job! Just as we REALLY love Big Brother.


    Minion 1369.000, Assistant Shoveler of Bovine Excrement, 2nd Class
    Lower Ministry Bowels

  3. 2020 January 30 6:24 pm
    drdog09 permalink

    The year is 1959 and Rod Serling yet again plumbs the depths of the gulf between ‘… the heights of our Betters and gulf of our Lessers’ to borrow from the usual opening monologue. So for your viewing pleasure, a audio play by the BJG Players of the “Impeachment Edition” —


  4. 2020 January 30 6:28 pm
    Eph permalink

    Been a while since we had a “Ministry” thread…

  5. 2020 January 30 6:32 pm
    Eph permalink

    Is IP still alive?

    Seriously, where is everyone??

  6. 2020 January 30 7:22 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

    Maryland robber enters bank in blackface … serious for the tellers but hilarious for commenters

  7. 2020 January 30 7:26 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

    Hully Carp!
    I thought Trump was Hitler … not Justine Trudeau
    Ezra Levant-
    I wrote a best-selling book about Justin Trudeau in the last election. After the election, I received a letter by registered mail notifying me that I was being investigated for that book. Trudeau’s elections commissioner claimed it was an illegal campaign activity and demanded that I submit to an interrogation. So I went to Elections Canada’s Ottawa headquarters last week, where I was grilled for an hour by two 30-year veterans of the RCMP — and they refused to rule out a police raid on Rebel News headquarters!

    They didn’t know that Levant recorded his interrogation.

  8. 2020 January 30 7:42 pm
    justrand permalink

    Eph, the Minions of the Ministry of Truth were temporarily unavailable…but now that they are Re-Educated they will be regular contributors. 🙂

  9. 2020 January 30 8:07 pm
    bc3b permalink

    drdog09 #3

    Long ago I worked for a company in Dayton, OH that rejected Rod Serling for a job in the late 1940s or early 1950s because, according to the psychological testing, they didn’t think he was creative. He went to work for a Cincinnati radio station instead.

    They rejected Rod Serling, but hired me. LOL!

  10. 2020 January 30 8:23 pm
    drdog09 permalink


    Socialism brooks no deviation from the official narrative. Trudeau never disavowed his socialist leanings.

  11. 2020 January 30 8:33 pm
    bc3b permalink

    drdog09 #10 –

    Nor has Bernie, Lie-A-Watha or the rest of the Democratic Clown Car.

  12. 2020 January 30 8:45 pm
    bc3b permalink

    Eph’s buddy, Bernie, is likely surging in Kalifornia:

    JR and JimNorCal likely have BERNIE bumper stickers on their Priuses.

  13. 2020 January 30 8:50 pm
    drdog09 permalink


    Serling was probably too ‘radical’ for them.

  14. 2020 January 30 8:59 pm
    drdog09 permalink


    Were I Levant I would order a high speed scanner and dump every piece of paper thru it. Make 3 copies of the hard drive secreted offsite and possibly out of the country. I would then plant self-incriminating red herring documents all over the place with UV triggered water marks that say ‘Fake’ and the date. I would also place IP cameras in hidden spots in the office, with the content spooled to the cloud.

    Sad thing is that crap is coming here. If the Swamp will come after a POTUS, they will come after anybody.

  15. 2020 January 30 9:04 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

    12, actually I put a tasteful Trump bumper sticker on the car early this month.
    I plan to keep it through Nov.
    No backlash, no keying, no middle fingers, no shouted insults, … yet!
    Wish me luck. 🙂

  16. 2020 January 30 9:05 pm
    JimNorCal permalink
    CNN Calls Out U.S. Coronavirus Task Force for… Lack of Diversity?

  17. 2020 January 30 9:10 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

    I had this sticker since donating in 2016.
    Finally decided to put it on and give aid-and-support for local “quiet Trump” supporters.

  18. 2020 January 30 9:17 pm
    drdog09 permalink


    I was going to ask, have your insurance rates gone up?

  19. 2020 January 30 9:20 pm
    drdog09 permalink

    NC now in the 2A game. 18 counties so far, #19 considering it —

    That is close to one out of five.

  20. 2020 January 30 9:24 pm
    Eph permalink

    12 BC,

    Warren #2, right behind.

    CA gets more pathetic by the minute

  21. 2020 January 30 9:44 pm
    justrand permalink

    I have a Marine Corps emblem hitch-cover on my truck…nobody fucks with my truck! Semper Fi!

    The paraphrase of Nietzsche rings true: “That which does not kill us makes us stronger…except Marines, they’ll kill you!”

  22. 2020 January 31 2:31 am
    JimNorCal permalink

    Way to go, JR!

    I’m an important test case though. If a pencil-necked retired software guy can fly his Trumo “freak flag” in Ro Khanna’s district for months on end it’s a sign that Trump has broken their spirit LOL

  23. 2020 January 31 3:49 am

    18 – They will if the company sees that 😉
    22 – lol

  24. 2020 January 31 4:22 am
    bc3b permalink

    JR #21 –

    Prius has pickups?

  25. 2020 January 31 4:23 am
    bc3b permalink

    drdog09 –


    I was going to ask, have your insurance rates gone up?

    No, but Allstate cancelled Jim.

  26. 2020 January 31 6:58 am
    drdog09 permalink


  27. 2020 January 31 7:16 am
    drdog09 permalink

  28. 2020 January 31 7:21 am
    drdog09 permalink

  29. 2020 January 31 7:37 am
    drdog09 permalink

    Oh the optics! — — Go get’em Bernie! “Those damn millionaires!!”

  30. 2020 January 31 7:50 am
    JimNorCal permalink

    KC coach wears Trump apparel.
    US life expectancy rises.

    ITEM 2: ABC reported, “Life expectancy in the U.S. rose in 2018, the first such increase in four years, according to a report the National Center for Health Statistics published on Thursday.

    “The average American man will live to be 76, and the average woman will live to be 81.

    “Those gains were driven by declines in 6 of the 10 leading causes of death between 2017 and 2018, and a notable drop in drug overdose deaths.

    “Overdose deaths, after increasing for decades, fell for the first time in 28 years, from 70,237 in 2017 to 67,367 in 2018, according to the report.”

  31. 2020 January 31 7:57 am

    Hillary could not be reached for comment.

    For reference you have turkey heavily supporting one side (GNA) , and us\fr\dm and ru to an extent supporting the other side Haftar (LNA) which aren’t exactly good guys either but arguably more legit. Kinda hilarious in that over the long term should Haftar prevail he’ll essentially just be another quack, meaning the whole taking out of quack was pointless. Anyway welcome to another proxy war with Turkey.

  32. 2020 January 31 8:09 am

    29 – Bad optics yeah (don’t expect to get much play though), but to be fair, I don’t really see the huge deal over them wasting yet another ~150k, what’s weird though is Perez and co said apparently they didn’t even ask for this (or they’re lying).

  33. 2020 January 31 8:14 am

    Not likely to happen (even if passed which isn’t all that likely either ) but it’s funny to think about.
    Utah’s H.B. 217 could help Utah voters recall Mitt Romney

  34. 2020 January 31 8:17 am

    Another one down.
    John Delaney drops out of potus race. 😉

  35. 2020 January 31 8:33 am
    JimNorCal permalink

    Liz has reached the desperation stage
    She’s just throwing stuff at the wall. She’s toast.

    Either Biden .. Bernie .. or some rabbit-outa-my-hat event.

  36. 2020 January 31 8:34 am
    drdog09 permalink

    VEXIT, its what is on the table now — — WVA legislature passed resolution and signed by the Guv.

    Would be funny as hell if VA succeeded from itself! 🙂

  37. 2020 January 31 9:22 am
    justrand permalink

    who is “John Delaney”?? Was he a candidate for President, or is “he” a nine year-old transsomething??? I am soooooooooo confused?!?

  38. 2020 January 31 10:49 am
    JimNorCal permalink

    When asked if Hillary caused foreign influence in the election through the Steele hoax, Dems say “that’s different”

  39. 2020 January 31 10:50 am
    JimNorCal permalink

  40. 2020 January 31 10:54 am
    JimNorCal permalink

    The typeface is small but essentially
    Trump lawyer: you said you’d prove every charge
    Schiff: I did!
    Trump lawyer: Then you don’t need more witnesses

  41. 2020 January 31 11:26 am

    40 – If true…. WWTTFF (even considering 10% are probably citizens trying to skip jury duty). Watch zero follow up will happen on that.

  42. 2020 January 31 11:29 am

    Update (1:20 p.m.): President Trump’s impeachment trial will be extended until Wednesday according to journalist Paul Sperry and confirmed by Fox News.

    BREAKING: Senate impeachment trial extended to WEDNESDAY
    — Paul Sperry (@paulsperry_) January 31, 2020

    Why?? SOTU is tuesday… fk them… potus should say…fk the SOTU I’ll wait.

  43. 2020 January 31 1:51 pm
    Eph permalink

    44. He definately won’t do that…

    King Eyore

  44. 2020 January 31 2:48 pm


  45. 2020 January 31 2:56 pm


    Under the circumstances if I were POTUS I would ‘phone it in’ by calling an impromptu MAGA rallye, in say Paradise, CA, the town that burnt down to the ground. $25 to get in and 100% of the proceeds go to rebuild the town. My opening at the rallye would be the SOTU speech.

    “My fellow citizens, these are tying times for many. The citizens of Paradise know that full well. The only help they will truly receive is at the end of their arms and YOU assembled here. All we have is each other, always has been, always will be. That has been the true SOTU since Washington penned the first one three centuries ago. I hope that never changes. To the Speaker, Members of Congress, Honorable Justices these are the people we serve, the people, so long as we never forget that duty the SOTU will be echoed for another three centuries; to fail is to fail utterly.

    Now lets rock on! MAGA…….”

    Nice thing about the USC, it does not proscribe how or where it is to be delivered.

  46. 2020 January 31 2:58 pm
    Eph permalink

    IP is alive and well


  47. 2020 January 31 3:47 pm
    drdog09 permalink

    Well if you can’t see yourself voting for a Democrat, vote for this guy —

  48. 2020 January 31 9:22 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  49. 2020 January 31 9:23 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  50. 2020 January 31 10:37 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  51. 2020 January 31 10:40 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  52. 2020 January 31 10:41 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  53. 2020 January 31 10:44 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  54. 2020 January 31 10:59 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  55. 2020 January 31 11:04 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  56. 2020 February 1 9:36 am
    bc3b permalink

    JimNorCal #60

    Better than last week.

  57. 2020 February 1 9:43 am
    justrand permalink

  58. 2020 February 1 3:58 pm
    JimNorCal permalink

  59. 2020 February 1 8:07 pm

    Chi-coms likely got this data:

    46 – I like that idea.
    51 – Those rumors been flying since about 3 weeks ago (stolen from Canadian lab and tweaked).
    54 – A thousand words. 😉

  60. 2020 February 2 4:16 am

    62 – Exactly… don’t care, never did much anyway. They’re too stupid to recognize the longer they wait the less of ‘deal’ they’re gonna get, such will only get worse in the future.

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